I’m so fucking weird
I’m the nicest rude person you’ll ever meet.
I don’t give a fuck about anything but at the same time, I care about a lot.
I hate people but I want to be everyone’s friend.
I hate myself but I’m completely fabulous.
I need help.
the true american experience is wondering if you just heard firecrackers or gunshots
PLEASE TELL ME THIS IS A JOKE
bonus points: both are illegal in your state and you still cannot tell
do not flirt with women when they are at work
do not take advantage of women who are in situations where they cannot say no or be blunt
^^^^^^ I’m not smiling at you bc I like you, it’s bc it’s my job to.